Edward was shocked, as Count Reamus put away his mysterious cake, and began stroking his grizzly chin, which was made of astroturf. Reamus began his story with a small speech about African Whales, and how he once fell in love with one in Barnsley. With this out the way, he told Edward that the cake he possessed in his left oversized pocket, was actually his father.
Edward, who's mind had now been flipped upside down and frisbee'd around the peak district, let out an abnormally high pitched scream, running 70 feet to his left. This was the worst day of his life.
Fin.
The morale of the story is, don't start writing a story about a dick head that goes to a cake party if you haven't thought of an ending. x
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